4/29/2015

Adventures In Cyber-Land

 by Shaun Lawton

"All I want for Xmas is a real PC, a real PC, a real PC, all I want for my birthday is a laptop not a Mac, a laptop not a Mac, please do not get me a Maaaac" is what I typed into the Google search field, and tapped enter. 

Did you mean: All I want for Xmas is a real PC, a real PC, a real PC, all I want for my birthday is a laptop not a Mac, a laptop not a Mac, please do not get me a Maniac?"  

I did not click on that.  Instead, I  retyped the answer into the search field, and hit enter. 

It responds with the first of 2,570,000 results in .93 seconds. “U2’s new album might be on your iOS devices right now  :




Your search - May I ask you why your first reply to my question "No, sorry for the digital glitch there, I - did not match any documents. Suggestions:
Make sure all words are spelled correctly.
Try different keywords.
Try more general keywords.
Try fewer keywords.
Try similar keywords.
Don’t try any keywords.
Try more keywords.

  • Now I was getting somewhere. When I tried more general keywords, I got Let’s Play Pokemon Ruby and Die Honorably, Honorably Die, and a site pimping network polymer products.  So I entered “Let’s Play Pokemon Ruby and Die Honorably, Honorably Die, and a site pimping network polymer products.” into the search field. And whaddaya know. Nowhere on the front loaded page of the first 124 results matched the prior page.  I got Full text of “NEW” - Internet Archive, | WatchMojo.com, and Click here to download - Bryn Mawr Computer Science. Three more down it said “The 0 TO 1 AND 2 OF 3 - word-clustering. I clicked on it. The first forty seven lines read:     
the  0
to 1
and 2
of 3
in 4
for 5
is 6
on 7
said 8
with 9
at 10
was 11
be 12
it 13
are 14
that 15
from 16
by 17
as 18
not 19
will 20
has 21
or 22
this 23
an 24
you 25
who 26
nt 27
but 28
they 29
their 30
about 31
have 32
he 33
were 34
had 35
can 36
we 37
been 38
would 39
up 40
more 41
your 42
when 43
which 44
his 45
its 13. That’s strange. The next fifty-four lines read:  
also 46
all 47
than 48
people 49
out 50
time 51
after 52
1st 53
year 54
our 55
other 56
just 57
into 58
what 59
some 60
new 61
do 62
if 63
them 64
over 65
last 66
could 67
there 68
like 69
no 70
get 71
did 72
because 73
so 74
may 75
says 76
any 77
only 78
home 79
she 80
now 81
most 82
through 83
my 84
before 85
where 86
back 87
her 88
how 89
make 90
should 91
way 92
going 93
good 94
off 95
those 96
re 97
state 98
game 99

being 12. What was going on here. What sort of order where these words listed in? The next line, the word “against”, was number 100. On the 101st line, no less. I scanned down the column of numbered words and saw that the sequence of numerals continuing by one did not get interrupted until after 139, with the number 93.  First there were forty-seven lines before 13 being introduced, then fifty-four lines before twelve, now thirty-nine lines and we get ninety-three.  I began reading the novel Ninety-Three by Victor Hugo recently. What, exactly, was going on here? 

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